Human Pin Cushion...

The title of this post exemplifies how I feel most days in a week. Giving myself that morning injection after I hop out of the shower is definitely not the refreshing experience I used to get from a shower, that's for sure. There is something to be said for the phrase, "Ignorance is bliss." I'll admit, sometimes I wish I could ignore the reality of MS and the potential future I face, but other times I feel empowered by the fact that I am making a conscious choice to fight back and try to keep my health and strength. It comes and goes, I wouldn't trust it... the feelings that is.

There is a story to be shared behind the decision to go on treatment. When I was faced with my diagnosis, I was, unfortunately, concerned about the cost of my health. A shame that in this country anyone would have to think on these things, but it is the reality of today. As I pondered our finances and my fate, I seriously contemplated no treatment. Only a crazy person would choose not to be treated, right? Well here's the thing. MS drugs don't necessarily do much for you on a day to day basis. There job is to fight the battle inside your immune system and get that sucker to slow down and act like normal again... You see, this is the challenge. It is really difficult to monitor your immune system without turning into a lab rat so I must trust the research. And thank God for the research. I really mean that... that's not just a catch phrase. I am really thanking God for research and the opportunity for treatment. At first, I was the skeptic but now I am the believer... What a transformation of emotions in a short span of time...

Back to the treatment story... originally I thought my drugs were going to cost us about $400 a month and yes, we have insurance. We went back and forth about this and later found out that treatment was $40 every three months... What a relief to lose a zero in that total. Then it gets better... The nice people at the drug company have a prescription assistance program available to all. And they really mean all. They offer $50 a month off the cost of a patient's copay and after a tiny bit of paperwork and being assured that I wasn't taking from someone else, I enrolled in the plan. To my surprise and overwhelming joy, my prescriptions are now free. Yes you read that right, I wrote the word, FREE.

Keep in mind they aren't free for my insurance and once again, thank God I have that, because my insurance company was billed $8209.33 for 90 pre-filled glass syringes. This is my fate - I am slotted to be on this drug for the rest of my life...

There is no better phrase to insert here then, "Holy Crap! that's expensive!"

So as I close another day and look forward to another morning dose and reminder of my MS, I am oh so thankful for the insurance I have and the fact that, although this diseases has forced me to modify the way I think, it hasn't changed the way I live my life and it won't change the way I live my life.